hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
