Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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