How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize