I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
You ruined the universe
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
