I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize