We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
