my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize