i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
