It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
