he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
