Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
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