i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
now i know why i became what i already was.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Randomize
