ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
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