How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Randomize
