i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Randomize