didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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