Texts From Last Night

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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.

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  (843): lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff. (404): Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks. http://tfl.nu/3kb3
  Replies (13) Good night (1171) Bad night (3427)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee

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  (248): Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee http://tfl.nu/hv9p
  Replies (3) Good night (699) Bad night (2492)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired

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  (902): I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired http://tfl.nu/suui
  Replies (19) Good night (3477) Bad night (1091)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.

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  (908): I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me. http://tfl.nu/2kto
  Replies (13) Good night (6546) Bad night (1367)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.

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  (205): I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face. http://tfl.nu/ce47
  Replies (74) Good night (2481) Bad night (9113)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom

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  (913): I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom http://tfl.nu/jxft
  Replies (9) Good night (4453) Bad night (943)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.

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  (214): It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils. http://tfl.nu/mamt
  Replies (5) Good night (1690) Bad night (838)
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  (831): View more from California

  sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.

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  (831): sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college. http://tfl.nu/u990
  Replies (3) Good night (1935) Bad night (653)
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  (916): View more from California

  Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.

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  (916): Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities. http://tfl.nu/3rzs
  Replies (4) Good night (1559) Bad night (576)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.

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  (703): Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic. http://tfl.nu/bmqq
  Replies (11) Good night (1536) Bad night (604)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.

  (214): View more from Texas

  SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.

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  (214): MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME. (214): SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME. http://tfl.nu/sfja
  Replies (12) Good night (1228) Bad night (505)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.

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  (847): I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low. http://tfl.nu/gpfm
  Replies (2) Good night (824) Bad night (1030)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success

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  (314): everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success http://tfl.nu/6cn0
  Replies (0) Good night (419) Bad night (365)
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  (805): View more from California

  went out last night. woke up with a lisp.

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  (805): went out last night. woke up with a lisp. http://tfl.nu/64b5
  Replies (4) Good night (240) Bad night (227)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?

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  (206): I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You? http://tfl.nu/a8e7
  Replies (2) Good night (277) Bad night (204)

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