She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
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so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
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Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
COCAINE IS GR8