The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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