we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
