I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
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