yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
