New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
