I could have mohawked her pubes.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
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She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
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Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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