What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize