And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
