OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
