community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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