I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize