So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
