So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
