your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize
