The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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