Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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