Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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