Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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