Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
