He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Randomize
