What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
