he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize