i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
