too bad you live with your parents still
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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