He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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