one word: firstdatebathroomanal
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Shame - the story of my life.
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