genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
