Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
