Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize