Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
