ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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