You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
there is puke in my bra ... again
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