Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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